Hi Sweetheart,

There’s a lot of terrible advice out there about how to last longer in bed. Unfortunately, men are taking this advice and applying it to their own sex lives - and when it doesn’t work as expected, they blame themselves, when they should be blaming the bad advice! As a female pornstar I get to see it all. I see men try the wildest and craziest things to last longer. I’ve seen guys punch themselves in the face to prevent from “popping” (what we call the cum shot in the industry) too soon. And NO, it was not an effective way to prevent his impending orgasm from happening, but we all got a good laugh about it!

So today I want to shed some light on some of these famously awful, so-called tricks to lasting longer in bed. And I hope you take this into consideration the next time you have sex with your woman.

Do not do this. This is the oldest trick in the book, made famous in the movie “There’s Something About Mary”. But I can promise you that it will not work for you. Here’s why; when you masturbate before you have sex you are essentially wasting your strongest hard on, which means your second hard on will be softer and weaker. Sure, you might last a few seconds longer, but it will not give her more pleasure – and that’s the whole point, you want to last longer...more pleasure for her!

Look at it this way, if you go to a gym in the morning and work out your biceps, then return in the evening to work out biceps again, you will be significantly weaker during your second work out. This rings true for your penis. After all, your penis is a muscle and should be treated that way.

Every once in a while a guy will show up to set and have a drink to help “loosen” him up, this is always a red flag for us female pornstars. Alcohol thins your blood, which means your penis will fill with less blood, causing weaker erections. And for me, there’s nothing less of a turn than to have a guy with a semi-erect penis thrusting into me. He usually grabs the base of his penis to force his erection, this is always a huge turn off and a bigger problem for the director.

The other big downfall to this method is the same as masturbating before sex, it doesn’t actually help you last longer in bed. Sure, it could add a few minutes to this one time you have sex, but…

A) This method won’t give your female partner more pleasure, which is the entire point of lasting longer. And…

B) This won’t lead you to having the ability to last longer by controlling your own orgasm.

You can quickly search the internet for “pills that help you last longer in bed” and you’ll find over 150 million results. The industry is littered with magic pills to help you maintain control and orgasm when you want. The truth about pills: 99% of them don’t work. And the 1% that do work, don’t work very well. 

Here’s why pills fail: when a guy I’m shooting a sex scene with takes a pill, I end up sitting around waiting until the pill kicks in…this is NOT a turn on for women. Not only is it inconvenient, it’s only a band aid to the real problem.

I’ve also been with guys that use creams or “delay sprays” to help them last longer. I can’t say this lightly enough: stay far away from these. Here’s how they work…you rub the cream on your penis before sex to numb the sensation and help prevent orgasm. These creams and sprays are loaded with lidocaine, commonly used by dentists. A few of the risks for using lidocaine:

1) You can have an allergic reaction and go through days of pain, risking permanent damage. The creams can also easily be passed to your partner's skin, putting her at risk!

2) You can permanently lose feeling in your penis. Guys who overuse the sprays and creams eventually won't have any feeling in their penis at all!

3) It is extremely unsafe to ingest lidocaine. You can seriously damage your intestines and become sick for weeks or months. This means there is no chance of oral sex after application.

All around, it’s best to avoid any kind of cream or spray, I’ve seen the horrible results first hand. Trust me, you don’t want to risk it with these.

XoXo,
Elsa